Faith

At times like these, people would say "your faith is being tested". Years ago, I'd have absolutely believed the same thing. Now, however, as I've read, studied, absorbed, and embraced different aspects of faith, my perspective is completely different. See, I think that for a lot people, that statement is a negative; that G-d is punishing a person for losing faith. I feel like its more of a gentle, loving reminder that He is still here, with me. That no matter how bad things may be, they could always be worse. The past few days I have found myself sinking into a bit of a "funk" (I don't want to call it depression, ummmm...denial anyone). I opened my inbox to find a request for a daily gratitude list--just 3 things I'm grateful for, each day. I firmly believe that is my G-d saying "hellooooooooooo, I'm heeeeeeere, remember??" Over the past week, a hospital in Hamilton (Children's Specialized Hospitals) went out on a limb to accept whatever our insurance pays them to get Zachary in. I was moved to tears by this outreach after months upon months of frustration trying to get him an evaluation somehwere that didn't cost $2000 up front just to walk in the door. This woman closed the "rule" book and spoke to her insurance people and got it done for us. There's G-d again...He's everywhere, huh! And I guess that's His whole point, to remind me He really is everywhere. Perhaps a couple weeks ago, or months ago, ahd I called this place, I may have spoken to someone else who would have just said no. Had Brooke not told me about bringing her daughter there I probably wouldn't have tried, as I do think I had called them at some point in the process. My faith is strong, and I just have to remember that my faith is strong. As a friend said once, I have to remember to "rest in the arms of G-d". Not walk with G-d, not find G-d; remembering I can rest in His arms is the knowledge that He is right here, with me, always.